Some final photos of our time together

Wednesday evening after a pizza dinner with my entire family, we drove to Madison as the first "leg" of our journey to Chicago, returning Panchito's family to Venezuela. Before this journey we asked our good friend Dan to take some family pictures.

This is Panchito's entire family. He has two sisters and one niece.

This is us! Again, it's hard to get a good shot of all three of us. What will happen when we are a family of four?

The kissing cousins!

Here is the most recent picture of our Katrina. She turned 2 1/2 on Tuesday. We remember her half-birthday because her half-birthday is my real birthday. We realized that while in the hospital after she was born.

So, Thursday we drove the rest of the way to Chicago (Now, some of you are surely thinking, "Why on earth did they take two days to get to Chicago? It is not that far from where they live!" Well, Panchito's family had some friends they wanted to see in Chicago and I knew that there was NO way we could get everyone "up and at 'em" by 6:00 in order to arrive in Chicago to have lunch with the first family and then dinner later with the second, so I suggested that we leave Wednesday evening and cut the trip in half. It worked out much more smoothly this way, for EVERYONE involved!).

We had a wonderful time with them and it is always really sad when we have to say good-bye. Living in two different continents means a lot of advanced planning when we want to see each other. One ticket from here to there or there to here ranges now from $1300 to $1600. You can do the math. It is expensive. For this reason when they come we really like them to be able to stay for a month or so. That is what they have done when they have come here. We, on the other hand, don't have that luxury. Panchito is a troubleshooter for his employer. They don't really like him to be gone for longer than 2 weeks at a time. Two weeks seems like a nice vacation, but when it takes 2 days to get to his parent's house in Venezuela from our house here and two days to get back, we feel like we have just arrived when we have to pack up and leave again.

Nonetheless, we did travel there twice with Katrina thus far. We went when she was four months so she could meet her Venezuelan family and we went for her first birthday. We are again planning, tentatively, to go with the new baby. We are thinking of going in either May or August. Now there is another "wrench" thrown into our plans because Panchito is finishing his mechanical engineering degree here in the US and we have to plan our trips around his classes (fall, spring and summer semesters!). This time Katrina is going to have to have a ticket too. I think this week she is going to start looking for a part-time job. I think I saw that Target is hiring!

One thing about more family members...

One hard thing about adding more people to the family: it gets harder and harder to take pictures where EVERYONE looks good.

In this photo Panchito and I look like we normally look. Katrina also looks like she normally looks, silly, but it is not the greatest family picture. It is not what I had in mind when I had my sister-in-law take it. I had hoped to be able to change the picture on my description but it looks like you will be able to see it in this post and we will keep trying and searching for another profile-worthy photo.

Our Trip to the Cabin

Since before I was born my parents have had a cabin up north. As a young girl we would go to the cabin almost weekly during the summer months. On Thursday we went to the cabin with Panchito's family. We had a great time and made some really fun memories. Here are a few of the highlights...

Katrina caught her first fish (well, helped reel it in). She was not too keen on touching it or helping Grandpa take it off the hook (normal for a young girl, I would assume) but she did like looking at it and telling everyone that she caught the second biggest fish of the day.

We took a walk down to Snyder Lake where we tried to catch a few bluegills. Katrina enjoyed throwing rocks in the water after Abuela (grandma) taught her how. The fishermen/women were not too thrilled with them scaring the fish, but I defended Katrina saying that she was occupied and having a good time.

We definitely had to visit the horseback riding place in Minocqua. Katrina immediately chose a helmet and picked a pony, Ozzy. She was a bit more apprehensive once Panchito put her on the horse. This picture captures her at her calmest. She clung to someone's arm the entire ride. It was fun nonetheless.

Some Boy Clothes

This first little outfit is from my sister-in-law, Francys, and our niece, Veronica, for their first sobrino/primo (nephew/boy cousin). Thank you! I am sure with his darker skin (which we are all assuming he will have like his big sister), he will look GREAT in white!

The second outfit is from my sister-in-law, Leanne, Shawn's wife. She said, "A little boy just has to have a pair of overalls." I agree completely! Thank you, Leanne.

We are adjusting well to the idea of a boy. It is strange... For the first 2+ months that we knew about "the baby" that is exactly what we used to refer to "it" -- "the baby." Then after the appointment at nearly 12 weeks, we started referring to "the baby" as "she." Now we are trying to refer to "the baby" as "he." Hopefully by the time "he" is born we will have things straightened out.

(Hopefully the doctor's right this time too!)

80-20

Have you ever been told that the likelihood of something is low? Has your lot ever fallen into that low category?

Let me give you some history... When I was a senior in high school I had my wisdom teeth removed. As most of you know, when you are about to undergo "invasive surgery" such as this, you are told that there is a VERY small likelihood that something will go awry and there will be complications. You are asked to sign a document saying you agree that this is a possibility and you go forward not planning that you will be one of those VERY VERY few people who have the complications.

Well, when I had my wisdom teeth removed a nerve in my jaw was knicked and I had severe complications. Not to bore you with all the details, but I had a "pic line" (portable IV) for one month, we made several trips to an oral surgeon in Milwaukee (4 hours from where we lived) and in the end the nerve damage was irreparable. The surgeon in Milwaukee said, "If this happens to ONE patient in an oral surgeon's career it is too frequent. This kind of damage is SO rare." I was that ONE patient.

Fast forward several years... Panchito and I had been married a bit over a year when we decided to "pursue" a baby. I had always wanted to be a wife and a mother and I had two fears regarding motherhood: I would not be able to conceive and that I would lose a baby in miscarriage. "Of 100 couples trying to conceive naturally, 85% will conceive within one year." We were in that small 15% category.

Fast forward again a couple more years... We finally had our daughter, Katrina, after three years of trying and were expecting our second child last year in May. Things seemed to be going along smoothly when one morning while getting ready for church I felt three drops. I never imagined you could actually feel drops, but you can. I ran to the bathroom and sure enough, there were three drops of blood in my underwear. We called our family doctor and closest friends and he recommended calling the ob on call. I called and spoke with a doctor. She tried to assure me that a little bleeding is normal blah blah blah and we made an appointment for the following day. The next 2 weeks were filled with appointments and ultrasounds. "Once an independent heartbeat is detected, your chances of miscarriage drop to 3-5%." We heard this after an ultrasound detecting our baby's heartbeat. We lost that baby a few days later. Again, we were in that VERY small percentile.

This same scenario happened one more time. We lost another baby after a heartbeat was detected during several ultrasounds in January. Another time in that VERY small percentile.

How can one couple fall into that category time and time again? I mean, really, what is the probability?

Well, I have another story to tell you... Four weeks ago we were at one of the appointments with the specialist (perinatologist -- high risk pregnancy doctor). He has been doing ultrasounds at every appointment (thank God for good health insurance) and as he was performing this ultrasound at 11 1/2 weeks he said nonchalantly, "Are you planning on finding out what you are having?" I immediately said, "You can't tell already can you?" doubting VERY much that he could determine the sex of our baby this early. He told us that he could tell so we said that we did want to find out this time around (we didn't with Katrina). He told us that at this stage of pregnancy the female part (I will spare you the names!) runs parallel to the spine and the male part runs perpendicular. When he showed us our baby's "part" it was running parallel, hence another girl. We were thrilled.

We would have been thrilled with a boy too, but after losing three babies in a row (the second miscarriage happened so fast there was no time to detect a heartbeat) we were happy with either, right!?

We told our families and our daughter who proceeded to tell everyone, "I'm having a baby sister." It was SUPER fun. We felt so connected to the baby. We weren't sure if that was because up until that point we had been so protective of our hearts not becoming too attached or because now we knew the sex. I am sure it was a combination of the two.

One thing I forgot to mention when we had this appointment at 11 1/2 weeks is that the doctor said, "There is an 80% chance that your baby will be a girl. This is the best educated guess I can make."

Well, Thursday I had another appointment. As the doctor looked over the baby he was very quiet and intent on the ultrasound screen. I became concerned. I said, "Is everything ok?" He said, "Everything looks really good, Kristina." I relaxed a bit. I said, "It still looks like a girl right?" I had been thinking about names while lying on the table waiting for him to come in to the room. He said, "Not at all."

"What? Are you serious?"

"Yes. Totally serious. Now the external anatomy is evident and it is NOT a girl."

I laid there dumbfounded. My first appointment without Panchito there and he is telling us we are in the small percentile again! He is telling us we are having a son!

We are thrilled. We were thrilled with a girl and we are thrilled now with news that it is a boy. We are a bit apprehensive... Should we trust it? We have the 20 week big ultrasound in about a month so it should be confirmed then, but for now, we are having a boy.

Many times throughout my/our life I have felt that being in that small percentile really stinks, but as I think back on these stories I have shared with you I realize that all of those times falling into that category have been gifts. I have not always considered them gifts, but they have been. I have been pulled closer into the arms of my Father as I have felt so alone in that small percentile. They have been the perfect places for me to be according to God's plan. I want to purpose in my heart to seeing these types of experiences, because I am sure there will be more in my upcoming days, as gifts from God saying, "I love you, Kristina, and this is what I have chosen for you. It is the BEST and it is a GIFT."

...Now I have to find a boy outfit...

One of the reasons...

One of the reasons I have not been blogging for quite some time is...

We are expecting another baby. We are 15 1/2 weeks along (when you have experienced what we have with pregnancies, you go by the 1/2s too!). Our baby is due at the VERY beginning of February. We are thrilled that the Lord has seen fit to bless us with another pregnancy and that He has allowed us to experience a healthy pregnancy this time around.

For those of you who don't know our story, we lost three babies since Katrina, our 2 1/2 year old daughter. We began to see a specialist in March and he discovered various things that he has been treating (folic acid deficiency, clotting disorder, progesterone deficiency, among other things). At the end of May we took a pregnancy test according to his direction and it came back positive. We found out VERY early (probably the earliest that you can know!) that we were expecting. We were obviously apprehensive to tell people, even our family and closest friends. As time has progressed more and more people know and I figured it was finally time to put it on the blog.

I am hopeful none of you are offended if you did not know until now about this baby. Although things are going very well and we are past our "danger zone" we have been extremely protective of ourselves. Each day our prayer is that the Lord would align our will with His and that He would prepare our hearts for whatever it is He chooses for our lives.

Earlier this week we went to the Mall of America (see next two posts) and I stopped in a Carter's store. This little outfit was so adorable to me, I just had to get it. After I paid for it we received a phone call from a close friend. I answered and he asked what we were up to. I couldn't hold it together. I got all choked up. I told him that we just bought our baby an outfit, the first outfit we have purchased for this baby.

I guess that I am making progress in the area of trusting, but it is tough. I feel like the more plans and things we have for this baby the harder it will be if something happens. And yet, before I bought the outfit I prayed, thanking the Lord for this blessing and for this time of carrying the baby. It feels right having this outfit in the closet.

Today I THINK I have felt the baby kicking. It is incredible! I have been waiting for this for a LONG time. We are so thankful the Lord gives us indications of positive growth with the baby.

PS Wondering about the pink outfit? We know the baby is a girl already!

Ask if you want to know how!

Highlights Part 1

Panchito's family is visiting from Venezuela for the month of August. We have been having a great time making memories together. Early this week we went to Minneapolis for a few days. Here are some highlights from our trip.... (Be sure to look at the next post to see more!)

We went to the Como Zoo and Como Town. What a fun little amusement park for younger children! Katrina had a blast. It is SUPER fun to see your child enjoying herself so much.

Katrina will not stop telling people about the giraffe "licking the wall." I am not sure why he/she was doing it, but it was interesting!

Highlights Part 2

Here are some more highlights from our trip....

Panchito and Katrina on the escalator at Old Navy. They went up and down about 10 times, no kidding. Katrina kept wanting to go "again" and his family was still shopping so it was a great distraction.

We had a really nice hotel and Katrina got to sleep with me in the big bed. She looked super adorable all wrapped in the sheets. (I don't appreciate how I look, but what can you do?)

One highlight from the Mall of America (which is where his family spent almost 100% of the time) was Katrina's first trip to "Build-A-Bear." Her aunt Francys bought her a cat. It was a fun time getting it filled and then giving it a bath and finally bringing it home. Thanks, Tia Francys!