Not long ago I was reading a blog of a blog-friend and she made
this cake for her daughter's birthday.
As soon as I saw it, I wanted the recipe because I knew it
was the perfect cake for Katrina's 5th birthday.
I have seen rainbow cakes before, but they
all involved many, many cakes which would end up
being WAY too much cake for one family of 4
plus a friend to enjoy for a birthday party.
So, Friday morning I set out to make this cake.
The recipe calls for gel food coloring and I could not find any
so I had to make my own gel food coloring in order
for the colors to be so vibrant.
Set-back #1.
Making gel food coloring is not hard, but it is a process
that involves time, bowls, toothpicks and unless I wanted
WAY more gel food coloring than I needed, mathematics.
I got the gel food coloring made and proceeded with the cake.
This was a super easy step as I went with a recipe that
calls for soda and a Betty Crocker mix.
Next I needed to mix the batter with the gel food coloring.
As I completed this step I was nervous.
Set-back #2.
Would the colors be vibrant enough?
Should I risk adding drops of liquid food coloring
and end up making the batter too runny?
I did and the batter seemed fine.
After mixing the batter with the colors, it was time to layer
the colors in the baking pans.
The greased baking pans.
I generously greased the baking pans
(or so I thought)
and popped them into the oven.
Set-back #3 occurred.
I had filled one baking pan too full and the batter was spilling
out onto the oven floor as it baked.
I quickly remedied that issue by placing a cookie
sheet on the lower rack of our oven to catch any
further spills.
BEEP.
The cakes were done.
I took them out and allowed them to cool.
After plenty of cooling time I attempted to remove the
cakes from the pans.
Set-back #4.
I must not have greased the pans generously enough.
Aghh!
Some of the cake stuck to the bottom of the pan.
I stayed calm, however, and did my best
to piece the cake together.
Then I needed to stack the cakes.
I was so thankful I had only made 2!
Once they were stacked and stable, I
proceeded to frost them.
The frosting step went quite well and as I was frosting
I noticed that all of the set-backs that had
occurred and could have made the cake ugly
were being completely covered by the frosting.
And the thicker I spread on the frosting, the more
the Lord spoke to me about my own life and how
I like to frost.
I have been living for 11 weeks with a deep-seated fear
that very few people are aware of.
I have frosted over that fear with a smile and a sweet laugh.
Instead of allowing people to see me in a
very vulnerable position right now, 15 weeks pregnant,
I have chosen to use frosting to cover up my vulnerability.
There are many reasons for why I have done this,
and I will not go into them, but as I sorted through the
reasons in my mind, I realized each of them was a sin.
As I frosted that beautiful birthday cake I was
convicted of my lack of trust in Jesus and His perfect plan for our lives,
for one, and second for my masquerading around like
everything is great.
Now, fast forward to when I made the first slice into the cake.
I cut into that cake and took out the first piece.
The girls and Pancho were oohing and ahhing.
Samuel was just drooling!
I took a look at the inside and it was gorgeous.
It looked even better than the frosting.
And the Lord impressed upon my heart,
"What I see is beautiful. Vulnerability is where I work.
When you cover that up, to yourself and others, you have not
covered it up to Me. I know that you are scared. I know that
you are hurting. Come to Me. Bring Me your fear.
Bring Me your hurt. I will carry it for you. It would be My
pleasure."
I cannot tell you what those words mean to me.
They are like a healing balm to my very soul.
I have resolved, with the Lord's help, to begin living
without all the frosting.
